Lost in Confusion

I'm going to have to be honest. I intended this blog to be a diary. But there's a lot more I'd be willing to write in a diary than I'd be prepared to risk writing on here. Because it's a bit obvious it's me, isn't it? I mean, there's the photo of me with my profile, isn't there, not to mention the photos of the horses.
But if I'm going to be honest, I'm going to have to mention Missis a little more, aren't I? And telling the truth may sound like I am criticizing them, which I don't want to do. And as far as I know, Missis doesn't read this, but if she does...
This blog was meant to be about us, and people that came into it were just incidental, but if I don't explain things, the situation will become even more confusing than it is now.
So... I had an opportunity to confront Missis about what she said yesterday about selling her horses. It transpires that Pongo moans that she is spending so much time with the horses at the weekend, and not with him. I told her my worries of yesterday, and she said not to worry, they'd always intended to have tenants, and she needed us and wanted us here. So that's a relief.
Then she said she might have liveries, to give me an income. What on earth does that mean? That she would still sell her horses and have liveries instead, and I would muck out? Because, to be honest, I wouldn't have the strength. To have DIY'ers who would obviously muck out for themselves? That would be good. To have cows? Hmmm. What work is involved there? I'd have sheep any day, though, that would be lovely. And more chickens. But it isn't my farm.
And I think that's part of the problem. They are very intelligent people, but they have so many choices, and take a great deal of time to look at the pros and cons of everything until they are exhausted and don't do anything. I'd have common sense over academia any day.
The main thing, as far as we are concerned, is to put a manege in, so that Mr O can ride in the winter. We are not people that only want to ride for six months of the year. If they have liveries they'll have to have a manege, otherwise they have no real facilities to offer them. But that doesn't mean it's a priority for Pongo and Missis.
That's the problem I think, in a nutshell. They are very good at starting a project, but hopeless at finishing it. The drive isn't finished, the stables aren't finished, the field drainage isn't finished. If even one of these was completed they would have something to show for their efforts. Otherwise, what can they really say they did in 2009?
Jesus was the 'author and finisher' of our faith, wasn't he? Thank goodness He didn't do half a job! Genesis says Noah 'finished the ark'. Imagine if he hadn't! Finishing what you started seems like a strong theme to me.
Missis says she doesn't know which thing to do first, whether to pay off the mortgage or fix the roof on the house. I had a giggle later on, as I came across Proverbs 24:27 which says, 'Finish your outdoor work and get your fields ready; after that, build your house.' Mmm. A word to the wise, I think.
So I have decided not to worry, and trust the God that got us here. If he can do this, he can do anything. I will just make the most of each day as it comes. And if it stops, it stops. There will be something better to move onto.

Don't Panic!

I feel like I am writing an entry for The Hitchhikers' Guide To The Galaxy. 'It had 'Don't Panic' in large, friendly letters on the cover'.
Missis came out this morning to say that her aunt died on Friday, but they didn't find out until Monday. I feel so sorry for Missis, because although her aunt had cancer, she wasn't really about to die just yet, if that makes sense. I don't know how else to put it. But then, in a way something that's even worse: Missis' dad is on holiday, and was beaten and mugged by a gang while he was out there. He is 63. My heart goes out to him, as it was his sister that died. He is on his way back now, a week early.
So I coped with all of this this morning, then decided to ride Max, and I have to say he was very good. I was soooo nervous. I don't think I've mentioned it yet, but it is exactly this time last year that I had a bit of an accident. I won't go through it all again, but basically I got lost, Max bolted with me and jumped a five-bar gate. I was hauling on the reins, thinking, 'It's a barrier, he'll stop,' but he didn't. He cleared the gate, which must have looked amazing, but I got thrown off from quite a height and ended up in hospital with internal bleeding. I don't want to think about it really, and it put me off jumping for most of last year.
So, as I haven't ridden since Christmas, I was a little apprehensive, as you can imagine, especially as I was on my own. I actually decided to use my common sense and walked him down to Jolly Farmer's so I could use the manege. I decided if he was going to be silly, he could be silly without me, but actually he was quite calm, strode out purposefully and had a good look around. Busy Bee was there, so I caught up with her briefly, as of course I haven't been down there over Christmas because of the snow.
I went in the school and got on and actually Max was very sluggish. I trotted him and he was fine, but has lost a lot of fitness. He is still quite supple though, which is good. He kept standing still of his own accord, as if to say, 'I think we'll have a little break mum, don't you?' I didn't push him, as the whole point of going was to just have a look around and get used to things again, and so that I don't ache too much in the morning, either. I love the way I've been saying to people, "I don't think he'll be very fit now." There's nothing wrong with his fitness at all!
I came back up the lane and Jolly Farmer was approaching on his tractor, just as Ben the dog was running towards us across his garden. I thought it might spook Max, if Ben appeared and started barking, and Max would jump in front of the tractor, so I made him stand still and wait for the tractor to go past. He kept fidgeting about in the road and wouldn't get on the verge, so in the end I got off and had a chat to Lucy Goosie while I waited, who I also haven't seen for ages. Max was quite annoyed and kept shoving me, saying, 'Can we go?' Honestly, that horse has the manners of a goat.
I walked him up a bit further, where there is a handy bench, so I got on and rode home, but he suddenly decided now was the time to be energetic, and started spooking at patches of snow in the field. Not even on the road, but in the field! I was determined to end on a good note, so I got off him again and led him the rest of the way home, so all in all the whole thing was more lead than ride, but at least I've done it, and can get on him again tomorrow.
This is because we have decided to enter the Indoor TREC competition at the end of January. It should be hysterical. There's no orienteering phase, just the control of paces and the obstacles, which should be a giggle. I am only doing it for a laugh on Max, anyway, as he will spook at everything, but Barnaby could do quite well. I am so looking forward to it, though. Better go and start the lorry up.
And then in the afternoon a very strange conversation took place. Missis asked me how you retire a horse. I said you could contact the Veteran Horse Society or Bransby Rest Home, but I think in the current climate they'd be full. When I asked why, she said she was going to retire Polo. I am astonished. Then she said she would also sell Fudge and just keep Lindy. I am appalled. What's to stop her selling him as well, he's not even her favourite horse, technically he's Pongo's horse, but he hardly ever rides him. Where does this leave us? They wouldn't have any motivation to build a manege, which we were promised, and why bother finishing off the new stables, or draining the field properly or anything? Why not just sell up and buy a normal house, like they had before? I am seriously worried. I have sold my house to move here, and given up some things I adored and would have kept. These people have the power to make us homeless, and I am not impressed. This was my reservation in the beginning.
I am going to God, on bended knee to pray this evening. Mr O is very taken aback as well. We've only been here a year. If there aren't horses to muck out, they won't need us here, will they? Grrrr, stress!

But on a lighter note, I made a card last night, as a thankyou to Lorayne for the cake 'tins'. (Can't really call them tins, can you?) It's the first card that went really well, and I am very pleased with it. I scanned it in, but for some reason it won't open on here, and I've put it in the envelope now. Fuming! It's also helped because I am going to Hobbycraft again on Saturday (so excited!) and have much more of an idea of what I'm going for, eg more card blanks, as some friends have just become grandparents for the first time, but I couldn't make them a card as I don't have enough blank cards sitting there ready for me to whip something up. I also need lots of plain card and paper as I used the water colour pencils again, which worked really well this time, but would be better on card than paper. I'd better go now and finish off my cross stitch, hopefully I'll be able to show you those. I might be better off taking a photo of them, but my scanner has never let me down before. A strange end to a strange day...

You Can Run, But You Can't Hide

I've risen with the lark this morning and rugged up and turned all the horses out. Lindy hasn't had a rug on for the last few nights, as his own central heating system has kicked in so he is sweating with a rug on. Even Max and Barnaby are warm with just a thin stable rug on and a thin turn out on top.
I've been out in the very wet field to put piles of haylage out for everybody, then turned the horses out. I do let the chickens out soon after, but they aren't keen to venture out while it's dark, which it certainly is today, and there is a thick mist everywhere. I can hardly see the horses in the field.
I have had all six horses to do, and managed it well, considering I've had to change all rugs and put cream and powder on Lindy and Polo. Missis did make 12 haynets before she left though, which have been an absolute godsend. Nearly all the beds needed a bale of straw in, but I'd still finished by 12.30.
The Ladies Who Lunch strolled over around 9.30. They remind me of Aggie and Kim, two very annoying women who present 'How Clean is your House?' on Channel 4. They go into someone's disgusting hovel and clean it up for them, only to find quite often when they return six months later that the property has returned to its former glory. Anyway, I won't be at all surprised if the chickens suddenly start suggesting that a mix of Epsom salts and vinegar, applied vigorously, will bring a lovely shine to each stable floor. And they know what they can do about it, too.
I had Seven and Nine after school. They asked to play with the playdoh. I am surprised children of their age still want to play with it, but each to their own. They're quite creative actually. I suppose if it was modelling clay instead of playdoh, nobody would mind, would they?
I am still reading Charlotte's Web to them, after the break for Christmas. We seem to have taken up where we left off with no problems. I am doing a brummy accent for Templeton the rat, and a very prim 'Alexandra Palace' voice for Charlotte. Nine stares at me in fascination when I do this, because 1: I'm quite good at it (I've always been able to do accents) and 2: I assume that Missis doesn't do voices when she reads to the boys, but I may be wrong. Nine does drama, so maybe he is storing things up for his first audition, you never know.
I have ordered some stamps and toppers from a brilliant website which came today, so I am going to have a little play once I've written this. We are finally getting post again, after no deliveries for two weeks.
This means my Christmas present from Lorayne has finally arrived. The parcel was very light. I knew she was getting me some silicone baking tins, but the last thing I expected was this:






I really had to think about the best way to show you what they're like. I think it was the colour as much as the texture that was such a shock. Apparently they go straight from freezer to oven, and obviously, because they're floppy, it's very easy to turn your cake out. You don't need to grease them, either. I can't wait to bake something now. Lorayne says they make a much better cake, so we'll see. Have you ever used them? If so, what do you think of them?

And in case you've ever wondered why my blog is called Chickens In My Kitchen, this should make it clear:




This is Henny Penny, always hoping for food, with Roxy peeking round the corner, seeing if it's safe to come in. They've walked through the stables, through the garage and arrived at the side door. You can run ...

Something's Got to Give

I seem to be spending far too much time on the computer! I've given it a lot of consideration, and I think Facebook is the main culprit. I haven't got time to sit and trawl through loads and loads of inane posts every day, especially if it's being particularly slow. I know I was looking for something more indepth, and facebook definitely isn't it. Plus it's impossible to control what people post, and some of it really doesn't bless me. I think it came to a head yesterday when I got a friend request from a total stranger who is twelve! I have got a friend on there who is that young, but I know her and her mum quite well from the Your Horse forum. But a total stranger, picking me at random, honestly!
Facebook's been altered fairly recently so it shows you the groups that people are joining, presumably to generate more members, but some of the younger girls join such random things, that you can't possibly want to post to. I am also about level 40 on Farm Town and don't play it any more. I do still play Farmville, but I find it a bit surreal to have elephants on your farm. It's okay for a bit of fun, but I've had enough now really. I do quite like Country Life, as you do more on it, but after a while it just becomes mouse clicking, which is just going to give me RSI, isn't it? So I think some serious honing is in order as:
a) I still need time to read books, which is much more satisfying.
b) Very soon I'm going to be back to riding, and I made the mistake of spending too much time on facebook last summer, something I do not intend to repeat this year.
c) I'd rather be doing cross stitch and card making. There aren't enough hours in the day as it is.
d) I absolutely love blogging. It is much more satisfying as you get a deeper insight into people's lives. I really think that's what I was looking for when I got into facebook.
e) I need to do more Bible reading, which will benefit me more than any of the above. I used to be very good at having my Bible time, but it's gone a bit loose lately. Time to get back to it, I think.
f) I do homework with Seven and Nine, and it takes a certain amount of research to get things done properly.
I think that's fairly clear then, a bit of a cut down on facebook is in order. Think how many hours you spend trawling through posts, doing farm games, checking all the gifts people have sent you etc. I have joined a cross stitch group on there, which I will maintain, but get rid of as much dross as I can. Spring must be in the air!

Busy Days

I am thoroughly enjoying the site of the emerging earth. I could get down and kiss it quite frankly. I feel as if we've been through a tremendous ordeal and survived, although more snow is apparently forecast on Wednesday, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
We went to the shop to see if I could get this month's edition of Cardmaking magazine, but it wasn't there. I was nearly lured into buying a cross stitch magazine instead, but resisted. Then we went down this alleyway as a shortcut, and there on the right was a craft shop. Why have I never noticed it before?
I went in and got chatting to the nicest woman ever. I asked her loads of questions, and she was absolutely brilliant, and explained so many things, including how to do decoupage, which I really want to do. I have come away with a box to store my embroidery threads in, as I am doing a little unicorn with a white body and silver grey mane. It's extremely difficult to tell the two threads apart, especially when you've used a few and only have a couple left. This box lets you separate each colour out and wind it onto a bobbin, which I did when I got home. It's made me wonder if Lisa's got one, as I could pick one up as a present for her. It must be next week we are getting together to go to Hobbycraft.
I also bought some stickers relating to a Christening, which is brilliant, as I've been able to find lots of 'New Baby' stuff, but no actual Christening things, so I can get on and make the card soon. I am getting a massive urge to make a card, so I probably will one day this week.
I bought some more wild bird seed, but they're not eating it half as quickly as the Bill Oddie stuff with the mealworms in it. Whoever thought robins would be so discerning? I have had a jackdaw at the table. I just caught sight of him as he launched off. It was like a Harrier Jump Jet taking off. The other birds looked a bit windswept, to say the least.
We went to Pop's Attic, looking for a welsh dresser. I am dying to get one, now Mr O has said yes. I used to have one years ago, and for some inexplicable reason, I gave it to Lisa. Why? Why? I'll be able to store so much stuff on it. I don't know if I can justify a brand new one, but one never knows, does one?!
We went to see Abby and the Flower Fairy. Abby looks a lot better, but you can see she is still in pain, poor thing. She isn't supposed to do anything for ages. We took the Winnie the Pooh DVD's Missis has given us, that Seven and Nine have grown out of. She didn't know which one to watch first.
I let Tessa out last thing while making a cup of tea for us both, and took it up to bed. I got in bed and started reading my book. After a while we heard a distant bark and wondered where it was coming from. Then I realised I'd forgotten all about Tessa and left her outside! Oops. She looked a bit miffed actually. Sorry dear.
And so this morning, Mr O rode Barnaby while I tacked Zak up, then he came back and rode him as well. He was all done for 9.30! He said Barnaby spooked at piles of snow on the floor (like they haven't spent the last few weeks looking at nothing but snow!) and the dog came out of Flag House and chased him up the road. Barnaby turned round and explained to the dog in no uncertain terms that he could 'go home!' I am so glad I didn't ride Max, he'd have had a fit. I am going to walk him down to the school on Wednesday and ride him in there to see how stupid he's feeling before we do anything too ambitious.
We went to church, which was brilliant as usual. You never know what's going to happen there, I think that's part of the attraction. We have Communion every week. And they read from The Message quite a bit and it sounds very good, I might see if I can get a copy.
We came home and mucked out on what felt like a spring day. I am glad we put the horses out in their mediumweight rugs instead of their heavyweights, they'd have been sweating.
Soon it was time to take Seven and Nine to the cinema. It was Seven's birthday on Friday. I gave him his card, the first one I've made myself that I've dared to send to someone outside the family, and Missis said it was excellent, which made my day. As Seven's birthday is so near Christmas, rather than buy more toys, I said I'd take them to watch Alvin and the Chipmunks - The Squeaquel, which they've been dying to see. Mr O had a good look to see if there was anything he could go and watch (anything at all???) but there wasn't, so he had to sit through it, too! Actually it was very sweet and quite funny. I want a chipmunk of my very own.
We took the boys to MacDonalds afterwards and bought them a Happy Meal, which happened to have a chipmunk in it, then brought them home. Quite a good evening really, and the first time they've been out with the two of us. They must be quite tired as they had tennis and drama in the morning, and Seven's actual party yesterday afternoon, but at least it gave Missis a chance to get some work done.
She is away for the next two days, so I've got all six horses to do and will presumably have the boys after school as well, so I hope I'll manage to get some crafting done. I am only doing the unicorn while Mr O is home as I am really doing a secret valentine cross stitch for him, but can't do it in front of him, can I? Quite frustrating.

I Don't Care What The Weatherman Says...

Well it's raining as I write this, and it's such a peculiar feeling, as if it's come after a drought, and feels utterly fantastic. The horses were sick of it though and were waiting at the gate for me at twelve.
We've had some fun and games getting them in lately. On Wednesday I got Max and Barnaby and was quite happy to come back for Zak, and Missis got Polo and Lindy, so I thought she'd leave Fudge to wait, but she suddenly offered to take Zak in as well. Zak walks in very well with Polo, so I said yes. I opened the main gate and walked through, seeing Missis behind me, and carried on walking round to the stables. When we got inside Barnaby suddenly whipped round behind me and I couldn't think why. Missis came in laughing guiltily. Fudge had run out of the field behind her, without a headcollar on and not wanting to be left on his own, but had overshot the stable entrance and ended up in our garden! Barnaby must have heard him and wanted to go and investigate. It did occur to me that Fudge might knock over my birdbath or sundial, but he soon came round to see where we all were. I could imagine his little face squinting through the window to see us and tapping on the glass with his hoof. In the end he came back round by himself, and I held onto his rug and guided him into his stable. Such excitement!
Then yesterday, nobody wanted to come in, and they all stood there looking at me, as if I'm some sort of idiot. So I nominated Max, and went into the field, put his headcollar on and led him in. This aroused all sorts of interest, so when I got back, I held open the electric fence and called Barnaby in. He came into the holding pen, but instead of standing there and letting me put the headcollar on, he began charging round and round in a circle. He looked in a foul mood, and I knew what he was going to do. Sure enough, as he came round again, he went straight for the electric fence and jumped it, but caught a back leg on it, and snapped one of the fence posts. He took everybody off for a good gallop round the field. Fudge just stood there in amazement, so I put Barnaby's headcollar on and brought him in, then went off to find a spare fence post.
I went back to the field, where everyone was bucking and leaping and generally being silly, and took the fencing cord off the broken post to attach it to the new one. Barnaby came into the holding pen to watch me, staring at me very closely, then went over and picked up the broken piece of fencing in his teeth and started waving it about, as if to say, "So! I broke this did I? You ought to have stronger fence posts, then, didn't you?"
Then when I'd finished he came and nudged me, saying, "Are you taking me in then, or what?" I had to laugh. What was all that performance for? I put his headcollar on and he ambled in with me, as quiet as a lamb. Every so often he just needs to remind me who's boss, that's all.



I love this photograph. Zak looks as though he's got the upper hand for once and seems to be saying, "Look Barnaby, we can do this the easy way, or the hard way!"

No Star for Flower Fairy's Wand

It's hard to write this. While I was busy writing about mucking out and taking nice photos in the snow, unbeknown to me, my youngest daughter Abby (21) was rushed into hospital with extreme abdominal pains. Mr O came home from work, and we turned the car around and drove straight back to the hospital, to find out what was going on.
At the time, they weren't sure whether it was a burst appendix, or an ectopic pregnancy. We managed to get to Abby's bedside just before they took her down to theatre. Lisa had obviously been there for some time, as well as Abby's partner Duane. Abby was tearful, and in obvious pain, despite the medication she was being given.
As you can imagine, we had been praying all the way there, and sat in the day room while she was in theatre, continuing to pray.
It transpires she did indeed have an ectopic pregnancy, and her tube was removed before serious damage could be done. They'd said she'd go down for a quick procedure, but I've had a lapiroscopy myself, which was supposed to take ten minutes and ended up being an hour, so I knew it wouldn't be quick whatever happened. In fact it was two hours before she was wheeled through to the recovery room.
Duane is new to all of this, but I'm afraid we've seen Abby go into, and come out of, theatre far too many times in her life. She had cancer as a child, and was miraculously healed. One day I'll tell you all about it. All the memories came flooding back.
I never cry in front of my children at these times. I know when Abby was fighting the cancer, the one time I cried was the only time she was frightened of what was happening. I also had a revelation that it wasn't me that was in pain, it wasn't me that was suffering, and that my job was to be strong for her, and I was.
So I cried all the way home instead. The operation went well, and she'll be fine, but please pray for a rapid recovery, physically, and emotionally, as she comes to terms with what's happened, as indeed must I.
They say it won't affect her chances of having more children, but I am keenly aware that we have lost a brother or sister for my Flower Fairy. So sorry, darling heart.